Where Your Heart Lies in Safety
by DarkPoisonousLove
Summary: A storm is taking over the night and the pouring rain is drowning out the feeling of security from Valtor's heart so he holds on to Griffin tighter in an attempt to escape the demons in his mind. Set soon after they got married. Part 4 of "Sparks of Life".


**A/N: Guess who had another idea from the storm we had last night. XD I was also dying to write something about this verse so here it comes. Now if I could only finish the first two parts, that would be great!**

The thunders were rumbling outside but all he could hear were the words in his mind, scarier than the electricity of the lightnings that only coursed through the clouds tearing the sky apart for a second. The voices had been tearing at his mind for decades. And they kept doing it even now after he'd buried them way back in the depths of his consciousness and the monsters weren't there to drag him back into their nightmare. But the nightmare would come regardless, if he ever managed to close his eyes with the storm raging outside.

He turned away from the window and to look at Griffin's sleeping form, the only peaceful harbor in the midst of his life's storm, and it immediately filled him with calm to know that she was sleeping so softly in his arms despite having seen the vicious things in his mind. She was gentle and vulnerable, and giving him so much strength that he could've never wished to draw from himself. It made him ache with the love she awoke inside him that was clashing with all the inner demons he had and still coming out victorious no matter how many times they'd sink their teeth into it and try to leave it in pieces. It was the most secure he'd ever felt to have that knowledge and all the illusions of power planted in his head had melted away to leave him only with the real strength of his feelings.

He snuggled closer to her, pressing himself against her warmth, against the inviting safety spilling from her body even when she was asleep, and leaned in even more to breathe in her scent hoping that it would make him fall into a pleasant dream himself. His hand wrapped around her waist and he held on tightly just in case the place he'd end up at wasn't quite so dreamy. He'd need a lifeline to pull himself out.

"Valtor?" Griffin questioned, her voice so heavy with sleep that she barely managed to get it out but there was still enough conscious thought in her tone as it poked at him in her attempt to figure out what was wrong. Her head moved just the tiniest bit as she was still in the embrace of her dreams but she fought them anyway to try to turn to him and see what was bothering him and he was so close to her that the slight movement of her hair tickled his nose, forcing him to pull away a bit but it was better than letting go of her.

"Everything's fine, Griffin," he said, doing his best to keep his voice hushed and gentle despite the guilt clawing at it. He hated lying to her but this time he had to. He didn't want her worrying about him when she had to be sleeping. She had work in the morning and he'd have to work through his own issues one of those days. He couldn't expect her to hold his hand all the time. She was human, too, and needed her rest.

"What's wrong?" Griffin asked, too well acquainted with his behavior to fall for that even when she was half asleep. And she was only beginning to pull herself towards wakefulness.

She turned around in his arms, making him miss the feeling of her body pressed against his as she did so and sending more pangs of guilt to his heart for disrupting her peace, but at least now he could see her face. And her amber eyes glowed like stars when she opened them even though there was no light they could reflect currently since the moon was suffocated in a blanket of storm clouds that shed their heavy tears over them, pulling at his own heartstrings hard enough to draw tears from him as well. But any sad impulse retreated under the attack of the love radiating from her gaze.

"Nothing," he said, trying to soothe the expectation in her stare, or at least the uneasiness it left in him. "Go back to sleep," he said as he moved to kiss her forehead and saw her close her eyes in bliss to accept his affection with. It helped his heart relax as some of the regret for dragging her out of her rest drained out of him. "You'll be tired tomorrow." It was today, actually. And that just proved his point. She had to sleep, and so did he. And perhaps now that he had the fresh sight of her precious love-filled eyes in his mind and the desire to stop affecting her negatively with his problems in his heart, he would be able to do that as well.

"I can tell something's troubling you," Griffin said, her gaze clear with no traces of sleep in it. She was wide awake and reading him as easily as always, and he couldn't hide from her anymore. Not that it had worked even when she'd been swallowed in sleep. "What is it?" she asked as she cupped his cheek and he caught a glimpse of the wedding band on her finger that couldn't shine in the dark but her love shined bright enough so that he could never forget it was there. "Tell me," she urged softly, always faithful to the "in good and in bad", and perhaps it was time he got used to that and stopped trying to hide the demons in his mind from her. She would see them anyway when they came out and it was best that she was prepared and knew what they had to fight.

"I can't sleep during storms," he said and took her hand in his, placing a kiss on her palm as he pulled it to his mouth, allowing himself to revel in the knowledge she was there. It was probably what had caused his restlessness that hadn't been present all the other times wind and rain had raged outside their windows. They'd been sleeping in one bed for years now, of course, but it was the first storm since she was sleeping in his arms as his wife, the first storm since they were officially a family, and it had brought back memories of the family he'd once had. "When I was little, I would always stay up during a storm because I wanted to enjoy the few moments of peacefulness I got," he said, not surprised to see the very slight movement of her eyebrows as she knitted them in confusion while she kept doing her best to just listen to what he had to say. It made him want to kiss her and take in her breath, keep it inside him so that he could feel at home in his own being. "My mothers were always more calm and controlled after a storm. I didn't know why that was but it made me feel safer when I knew they were less likely to lose their temper and punish me the following day. And I wanted to soak up as much of that feeling as possible since it was rarely present so I would stay up all night until I eventually found myself unable to sleep during a storm." He'd known how profound of an effect storms had had on his mothers when they hadn't even scolded him for dozing off at the breakfast table the next day and it had been most soothing. He'd almost come to see them as caring when they'd been like that. Which only spoke loudly of how horrible things had been throughout the rest of the time.

He watched Griffin's expression change slowly as the information sank in. He'd never told her about that, afraid to let the memories in his mind, for he had to remember the kind of monsters his mothers were. He couldn't let them back in his heart, for they'd kick Griffin out of his life if he ever allowed them anywhere near her. And he couldn't have that. She was the only one he'd truly felt safe with. He didn't have to stay up late and lose sleep to revel in the security of her arms around him, for it would be there in the morning as well, forever his. She wasn't going anywhere and he'd learned to trust that, allowing himself to feel safe all the time... Until the storm had disrupted his peace and he'd disrupted hers with the fragments of trauma still left in his mind.

Her eyes looked fragile with the sadness that crept inside them but there wasn't any pity–she knew he'd rather die than have himself or someone else feel sorry for him even if there was plenty to regret when it came to his past–as her lips got pulled into a small smile, all the more impressive for coming victorious out of everything it had to fight through.

"You can always sleep with me," she laced their fingers together, the feeling of her wedding band against his skin putting his mind at ease like nothing else ever had. Because she'd agreed to marry him even after seeing the most screwed up parts of him and she was there to look them in the eye with a smile on her face and love in her gaze and help him fix them. "Or you can stay awake," she said. "Whatever you want." All he wanted was to be with her, safe and free from the past hurt. "With me. Always with me," she whispered as if she'd read his mind and stroked his hair with the hand he wasn't holding, confident in the comfort she brought him and ready to offer it. It was those things that had made him stop doubting he could love her more because she always found a way to make him love her more. Even when he thought it was impossible. There was nothing impossible when she was at his side.

It was only proven further when he felt his eyelids growing heavier as his heart was lighter now that it was freed of the fear weighing it down. Her fingers running through his hair were all the reassurance he needed that the security he was feeling wouldn't disappear by morning. Her touch had always been gentle and plentiful and she'd never stopped giving it to him just like she was doing with her love. So he leaned in and touched his forehead against hers, hoping to find her in his dreams just like she was always there with him in reality. And even if he didn't, her warmth would still be there to tether him to her and the safe haven they'd built for themselves.


End file.
